Hey Y'all I'm Back

I am finally back after nearly a year off. But I am back as the Tattooed Modern Ex-Wife. My marriage fell apart last September shortly after I started back at the bank I love (where I still work). I will not provide the details of the divorce but lets just say it had to end. The ex and I still get along but what happened was beyond repair. I hope to start writing more again about my experience over this past year and the struggles I have gone through with being on my own. Look out for more to come!

New Job Again!

I have great news. I am back working at one of the banks I loved. It was hard for me to leave the position I was in at the current bank I was at but I could not turn down an opportunity to go back one of the best places I ever worked for. Hopefully this is my last stop for a long time. I am three days in back at my old place of work and I am very happy. I also came back as a project manager instead of an analyst so it is a promotion for me. I should have more time to write more now. 

My Fat Ass Update

I started counting weight watcher points again...you all know by now. Every time I need to drop a few I start counting points. I made it to my goal weight of 131 in a few weeks. Down from 136. Not sure if it is due to organs being removed from me during my surgery but hey...I will take it.

Southern Style Banana Pudding

I completely forgot to take a picture of this! I made my famous Southern Style Banana Pudding for a work picnic yesterday. 


First lets discuss what should NOT go in banana pudding. Never actually use banana pudding mix. It should be French Vanilla...not vanilla...French Vanilla.


OK now that we are clear on that part lets discuss just the name itself...Banana Pudding. It really turns out more like a mouse than pudding which is why people tend to screw up the recipe when they make it. 


Here is my recipe I received from a lady I worked with. This is the true Southern Style Banana Pudding recipe. I guarantee you will not be disappointed. You can make this using a lasagna pan or layer it in a trifle dish. You also can use light, sugar free, and fat free ingredients on the items available and it will not greatly impact the flavor.


Southern Style Banana Pudding

1 box vanilla wafers or Pepperidge Farm Chessmen Cookies

6 to 8 bananas sliced

2 cups milk

1 (5oz) box instant French vanilla pudding

1 (8oz) package cream cheese, softened

1 (14 oz) can sweetened condensed milk

1 (12oz) cool whip

Line the bottom of a 13 x 9 x 2 inch dish with vanilla wafers and then layer bananas on top.

In bowl combine the milk and pudding mix. Blend well with mixer. In another bowl, combine the cream cheese and condensed milk. Mix until smooth. Fold cool whip into the cream cheese mixture and add the cream cheese mixture to the pudding mixture. Stir until well blended. Pour the mixture over cookies and bananas. Cover with remaining cookies. Refrigerate until ready to serve. 

Savannah

Tony and I did still take our trip to Savannah since we already paid for a night at the bed and breakfast. This was our first time ever staying at a bed and breakfast and we really enjoyed it. The food was amazing. 


Our in keeper baked fresh pasties and delivered three different types to the room the night before. Most of them did not make it until breakfast. In the evenings she made appetizers and served drinks. We stayed at the Zeigler House Inn off of Jones Street. The location was perfect. I highly recommend staying here.


Tony and I took a dinner cruise. We see them all the time in coastal cities we visit so we decided to give it a try. Price was $50 a person and that did not include drinks. The food was catered by Paula Dean's catering company. My review....This blew and was a total waste of money. The food was awful. It was served buffet style and as soon as everyone went through one time they started pulling the buffet down. The meat was dry and their side items were nothing special or good. The dinner cruise went back and forth on the shoreline. For two hours we had the same scenery over, and over again. Part of that scenery being an ugly shipping port. We did meet some nice people on the cruise and the band they had was pretty good.


After our horrible dinner we went to The Pink House which is known to be haunted. We had drinks in the basement. I wish we would have skipped the dinner cruise and had a nice dinner at The Pink House. I asked the bartender where the bathroom is and he informed me the women's bathroom is haunted. Still not thinking much of it I went along my business and was disappointed nothing happened to me in the bathroom. The second time I had to go there were two other women in there and only one stall. The one lady looked at me and asked if I knew the bathroom is haunted. I replied, "yes, but I was in here earlier and nothing happened to me." I am NOT kidding when I say right after I said that the door handle on the women's bathroom started shaking and the door was pulling. The lady opened the door and there was no one on the other side. She was pretty spooked. Finally my turn to use the bathroom and they asked me if I wanted them to wait for me. I said , no I will be fine. When I returned back to my bar stool the bartender said to me the women came out with spooked looks on their faces and knew something happened. My response, "that was awesome!" Only I would think an encounter with a ghost was awesome. I researched the history behind the haunting of the women's bathroom at The Pink House and it turns out the ghosts of children try to lock the women in the bathroom as a game. The bathroom used to be one person at a time but they had to put a door up in front of the toilet and take the lock of the door to get in because so many women were ending up locked in the bathroom. Even though the lock is gone the ghosts still try.


Here are some pictures from our trip.

Scary Statue of Marilyn Monroe - I grabbed her ass in front
of a lot of people.

Picture on the front porch of the Inn

The famous Savannah Water Fountain

There were two guys singing to me "She's Some Kind of Wonderful".
It was rememberable yet embarrassing at the same time.

Love this fountain. It is in one of the squares.

On board the dinner cruise. That is the only scenery we saw the whole night.

That band aid is covering another dysplastic mole that was found on Tony.
Our dreams of living in the Caribbean are being wilted by skin cancer.

Back on a Budget

It has been a while since I complained about being on a tight budget. Well we are back on one. Just when we were getting ahead Sydney got cancer, I got skin cancer and had a hysterectomy, and while we were hoping to have a tax refund we ending up owing...a LOT! Tony and I are fortunate we do not have credit card debt so when things like this happen it is not completely devastating. We were very lucky while all this was going on we received a zero percent interest offer through my discover card so we used one card and then transferred it all to discover, interest free for a year. 


So now we do carry a balance but are anxious to pay it off as quickly as possible before the year is up. I could not imagine all of this hitting us if we carried a credit card balance. The last statics I read was the the average household credit card balance went up from $7k to $10k. That is a lot of money to have on a credit card! I strongly encourage people reading this blog to focus on paying off your debt as quickly as possible. It is such a great feeling when the cards are paid for and it is going to save you so much money in the long run. 


We cancelled two of our trips this year. I really did not want to because we were going to go to NYC to celebrate my 30th birthday. NYC will always be there and even better is my friend Tanya will be flying in from Florida for my 30th so Tony will be throwing me a party. We still are going to go to St. Croix in November. Of course we bought those plane tickets just a week before our financial melt down. 


Alright the fun challenge for me. How long do I go before I buy something I don't need. We will have to see....I am pretty determined this time until I see a pair of Michael Kors shoes on sale.

More Black Belt Pictures

Here are more pictures from my promotion ceremony.

Harley Ride

It has been a while since Tony and I went on a Harley ride. We did the Got To Be NC ride and had prime parking inside the event. One thing I do hate about the name of the event. "Got to be NC". Way to go NC for having an event with poor grammar in the name. The kids in the state are screwed when it comes to English. 

Life Changing Event

Earlier this week I had a hysterectomy. Tony and I thought about this decision long and hard and decided it is the best thing to do for my health. About three years ago we decided not to have children but it still is hard when now our ability to change our mind is taken away. I am looking forward to feeling like a woman again and so looking forward to not having any more pain or massive bloating. Tony and I did discuss if we ever feel like we are missing out on a family we can always adopt. I will say I am so in love with my furry children I am fine continuing to save dogs from rescue organizations as mine pass on. Hey....they are cheaper too. :)

Jack using Stella as a pillow.

Black Belt

Last Friday I earned my black belt! It was a long road and I cannot believe it happened. Tony did not see me practice much and he said during the promotion he felt such a sense of pride in me.

Meet Stella

Tony and I were looking for a German Shepherd but we ended up with a Bull dog mix. We found the rescue groups way too difficult to work with. While we like their philosophy behind their method, it just did not work for us since the person who decided where the dogs were placed was the foster parent. The puppy we really like was being fostered by a woman that was way too attached to the puppy and was very discriminating against Tony and I and our dogs with their behavior. She did not listen to how we know our dogs will react. We started looking elsewhere and fell in love with this cute little bull dog/boxer mix puppy. We are pretty sure there is some pit bull in her as well. 


Tony and I seem to not do anything in the proper order. We adopted Stella three days before we left for Savannah. I hated to have to take her to a kennel right away but it ended up working out really well. Stella was boarded at our vets office so she received all her booster shots she needed as well as her exam. Jack and Oscar went to their place for boarding and doggy daycare. It gave them a break from the puppy to help them adjust.


It took a few days but Stella is part of the pack now. She is such a sweet, submissive dog that Jack and Oscar needed. Potty training is going OK. She does not know how to ask to go out but understands she should be going outside. Tony and I just love her and are so happy she is part of the family. Our house is back to being crazy with animals and I would not have it any other way. Stella is just over four months old right now and in the last two weeks already put on 5 pounds. She weighs in at 33 pounds and is expected to get between 50 and 70.

This was the picture online that stole our hearts. She is three months old here.

Stella likes to steal the pillows during the night.

Pack nap

Our baby girl

Spider Vein Treatment - Laser vs. Needle

I started getting spider vein treatments about two years ago with the needle injections. Earlier this year I bought a groupon for spider vein treatment by laser. I had my first laser treatment a few days ago. I am NOT happy. 


Sure the thought of a needle may freak some people out but the vein dies right away. They also hit so many veins in a short period of time. With the laser they have to numb the area and it takes just sooooo much longer. I would have to say one 30 minute treatment with the needles is equal to four to six 30 minute treatments with the laser.


Now there are some benefits to the laser. There is no massive bruising if you are going for the deeper veins. The small purple ones on the surface do not bruise. The deep blue veins do sting afterwards for a few hours. With the laser there is no stinging afterwards. However I just cannot justify the amount of time and money for the laser. Going forward I am only going with the needle injections.

Botox

I finally tried Botox...and I love it. 

So if you never had Botox before here is what to expect. The injections do not hurt. If anything there is a little stinging which does not last very long. When you leave the office there will be lumps on your faces that quickly go away. The muscles do not start paralyzing until 3 to 5 days after the injections. It was kind of fun trying to move the muscles and I could not. I no longer can make a mean face so Tony does not know when I am mad at him. I can't make that face no matter how hard I try. Full effects of Botox show in two weeks which is this coming Friday for me. The wrinkles in my forehead really have disappeared. Tony...every birthday, Valentine's Day, and Christmas, please get me Botox!

Ocoplastic Surgery

The chef of ocoplastic surgery at Duke performed the closure on my face. She did a wonderful job cutting the skin in a certain pattern so it heals with minimal scarring. The first picture was from right after the surgery and the second was from this morning. You can hardly tell from a distance and with a little makeup. The stitches come out in a week. Right after the surgery some Bitch at Steinmart (where I was shopping waiting for my prescription to be filled) had the never to say to me "It looks like someone gotcha good." I looked at her and said "yeah...skin cancer." Next time I get a comment like that I suppose I should say "You should see the other guy."

Mohs Surgery

I had the Mohs surgery today to remove the basal cell skin cancer. I am very lucky because they only had to cut once and were able to get it all. A lot of people end up being in the office all day with constant back and forth cutting more out until they get it all. They also did not have to go very deep. With basal cell skin cancer it typically goes down to the bone. Let this be a lesson to all you reading to not ignore bumps and lumps on your body. This was only there for six months before I went in. Some people wait years and end up with extremely large areas taken off their face. Here is what it looks like now. Tomorrow I see the ocoplastic surgeon to close it up.

We're Adopting....a dog :)

Jack has been terribly sad since loosing Sydney. Tony and I decided to adopt another dog for him. Right now we are working with a local German Shepherd rescue group to find him the perfect girlfriend. I never worked with a rescue group before. It is a bit more than adopting from a shelter but we are going to make sure we get the perfect fit for our home. Since Jack has aggression issues with other dogs when I am around it makes perfect sense to work with a rescue group that also has dog trainers that volunteer too. Right now we still are in the application phase. Next is the home visit. The process can take a few weeks to a few months until the perfect dog is found. I am extremely excited to get him a new girlfriend. I still miss Sydney dearly but we are saving another life in her honor.

I never fully understood what the appeal was to German Shepherds until we adopted Jack. They are so incredible intelligent and trainable. I think Tony and I will always own them going forward.

On a funny note Tony taught Jack how to howl like a wolf. It is freaken hysterical. I will post a video one of these days. Extremely funny when he gets his snout in the air to howl and nothing comes out.

Tony Joins in on Skin Cancer

After I found out about my skin cancer I sent Tony into the dermatologist for a full body check. He got is results back today for one of the moles sent off. The mole came back as dysplasia - the pre-stages for melanoma. I am so glad they caught is in time. He goes back in a few weeks to have more skin dug out of his leg to remove all the dysplasia. We sure would have looked like a funny couple if we had not gone into the doctor for the spots that just did not look right on us. We would have looked like pirates. Tony with a peg leg and me with one eye. I think when I go back to work after my surgery I am going to have to borrow Tony's Jack Sparrow wig since I will have an eye patch on.

I did find out I will need eye lid reconstruction. The first day is removing all the cancer and doing what plastic surgery they can to fix my face. My eye lid will still be an open wound until the next day so I get to sport the awesome eye patch. The second day I will be at Duke Cancer Center getting my eye lid reconstructed. Fun stuff. If only they included Botox in the price.

If you are reading this please schedule a full body check with your dermatologist!

Good-Bye Sydney

Almost two weeks after Sydney's surgery she died. Her blood levels are what gave us hope through the process that she would survive. Tony and I took her to the emergency hours at our vet's office. She had not eaten for three days and was throwing up water. Her blood work showed the worst. The cancer moved into her blood stream and she did not have much longer to live. Tony and I decided to put her down peacefully that night rather than her suffering for a few more days.


When we put Otis down over six years ago we did not stay with him and this is the biggest regret of our lives. We knew we had to stay with Sydney until the end. The vet's office did a very nice job making it comfortable and peaceful. They also sent us flowers and a card the following week. 


It is so terribly hard loosing her so fast. I think it was even harder loosing her than it was Otis. Otis was old and we knew his time was coming. Sydney was a completely normal dog and then in less than three weeks cancer took her. I still tear up driving home because she is not going to be there. It is a different feeling walking into my house. I am used to three dogs storming at me, each one pushing the other aside to greet me and whomever else visits. Jack and Oscar still greet us but my big girl is missing.


I don't remember how long it took me to get over Otis dying. My brother died a month after he did so my sadness turned to my brother. It is going to take a long time to get over her.


Mom and Dad love you baby girl. Take care of Otis and my brother in heaven.

Skin Cancer Sucks

Two weeks ago I found out I have basal cell skin cancer below my eye. This was traumatizing to me given they will have to cut out my skin below my eyelid and possible reconstruct my eyelid. This type of skin cancer is not the kind that transfers to the organs. That is melanoma. I went into the doctor thinking I had a skin tag. What I have is not what you think skin cancer looks like. This was not a mole. It was a very small skin colored bump not even a half inch below my eye. I thought it was a skin tag which is what I originally went in for. While it does really suck this is on my face I also am very fortunate it is on my face otherwise I would have ignored it. My surgery is scheduled for April 9.

The following day after finding out about my skin cancer I received deviating news. My dog Sydney has melanoma skin cancer. I took her in for a bump on her skin about the size of a quarter. Who would have thought dogs get skin cancer. The day of her surgery they found another spot of skin cancer starting. It also traveled to her lymph node. The lymph node in the groin on a dog is about the size of the tip of your pinkie finger. Hers was about the size of a soft ball. This all took only a matter of a week and a half. She was a normal dog before. I cannot believe how fast it grew.

The day we brought her home from surgery

She had her surgery to remove the cancer. It came back at stage three which gives her about 6 months to live. I have been so worried about her that I really have not even paid too much attention to my skin cancer. I am having a hard time getting her to eat. She looks so depressed. I just cannot stand seeing her like this. Right now I am focusing on getting her healed from her surgery and then keeping her comfortable for the remainder of her life. 

Jack realizing what is wrong with her

Cheesy Potatoes

Nothing says comfort food to me like Cheesy Potatoes. Just because they say Cheesy does not mean it has to be high in fat. I made some modifications to this classic Kraft recipe.

Cheesy Potatoes

Ingredients
1 can (10 3/4 oz) low fat condensed cream of chicken soup.
1 1/2 cup fat free sour cream
1 package (32 oz) frozen southern-style has browns, thawed
1 package (8 oz) reduced fat shredded sharp cheddar cheese
20 light ritz crackers crushed

Directions
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Mix soup and sour cream in a large bowl. Add potatoes and cheese. Stir until well blended.

2. Spoon mixture into a 13 x 9 inch baking dish. Sprinkle with crackers (original recipe calls for mixing the crackers with butter).

3. Bake for 50 minutes or until heated through.